马男波杰克第五季

首发于公众号“影探”ID：ttyingtan作者：大表姐转载请注明出处从第一季开始，马男系列的评分就没掉下来9分过。

第五季更是以9.3分强势回归。

有人或许奇怪了。

就这么一匹马，丑啦吧唧，低眉搭眼的，凭什么这么招人喜欢？

别人我不知道，反正对表姐来说，马男就像一剂精神鸦片。

贼！

上！

瘾！

你看看它的基调。

播到第五季了还是那一个字：丧作为一个中年过气明星，马男对抗焦虑的方式竟然是——逃避。

找工作？

why? 是酒不好喝，还是烟不好抽？

还是勾搭来的妹子不够靓呢？

40来岁，依然没有相爱的人。

So? 随便跟谁约一炮就好了。

哦，这个“随便”，是真的很随便。

前女友兼经纪人？

可以。

片场合作的女主角？

可以。

甚至当年电视剧里扮演自己女儿的童星？

可以啊没问题。

交心的朋友？

在他家沙发上赖了6年的Todd算一个。

可马男那个态度...日常不耐烦，经常性打击，永远毒舌。

最后天使如Todd，也因为伤害彻底离开。

还有永远给他擦屁股，偶尔也上床的前女友兼经纪人Princess Caroline.根本不爱他。

在一起，也只是因为惧怕孤独，互相取暖。

就连唯一懂他的女人Diane，也选择嫁给了更阳光的Mr. PeanutButter。

说实话，每次表姐看着马男的生活，就像看着一个巨大的黑洞。

他唯一擅长的事，就是伤害对他好的人，就是把一切都搞砸。

这样的人，不是人渣又是什么？

可我们偏偏又那么爱这个贱人。

甚至有点...心疼他。

因为丧，并不是他的锅。

作为一次意外怀孕的结果，身为中产阶级的妈妈，不得不因为他，下嫁给了穷困的老爸。

从小，他就被当成是个累赘。

听到最多的话，不是“我爱你”，而是“都是你，毁了我的生活。

”

每天看着爸妈争吵，互相指责，没有人在意他的感受。

老妈更是坦言，“你不会幸福的”。

因为你天生破碎。

试问这样一个从未被爱过的人，又该如何去爱别人？

所以除了丧，他还“毒”。

“毒”，是因为被伤到之后，就能一眼看清，哪些是真相，哪些才是谎言。

他换无数女友，孑然一人，不过是看透了恋爱的本质，无非是互相伤害。

也知道人间不值得，假装开心，自欺欺人。

虽然嘴巴一直在得罪人，但心里其实知道大家最想听的是什么。

也早就比其他人参破了人生的意义。

其实从头到尾，马男都是个底色悲凉的、孤独的清醒者。

就像《闻香识女人》中，阿尔帕西诺那番话：I always knew what the right path was.Without exception, I know, but I never took it, you know why?It was too damn hard.一直以来，马男都知道哪条是对的路。

可他也从来不走，因为太他妈的难了。

所以他一边胡作，一边愧疚，直到第三季结束，所有人都离开了他。

大厦崩塌。

第四季的开头，马男消失了一年。

他远离LA，来到母亲小时候的家里。

在那里，他了解到，原来妈妈也有一个不幸的童年——当年她的哥哥战死，母亲患了抑郁症，父亲态度冷淡...她也没有学会怎么去爱人。

之后回到LA的家里，有一个姑娘来找他认亲。

DNA测试后，发现是自己的“女儿”。

“女儿”要马男一起，帮她寻找生母。

就在这个过程中，他无意间发现这是一个大乌龙：自己其实是姑娘的哥哥。

而当年，正是自己的母亲，帮着姑娘的母亲，也就是插足者，生下了孩子。

“她或许，也没有自己认为的那么刻薄吧...”

故事进行到这里，所有人都以为马男会有一个happy ending。

跟母亲和解，做个有爱的哥哥，和家人团聚。

然而第五季一开头，马男的母亲就去世了。

葬礼上，马男一如既往地开着那些刻薄的玩笑。

可这一幕，却让表姐真实地掉泪了。

致辞时，他提到母亲弥留之际，曾经对他说过最后一句话：I SEE YOU我看见你了

尽管装出满不在乎的样子，马男还是忍不住猜测这背后的意味：她的意思是终于看到我了吗？

54年，妈妈我终于被你看到了。

原来你知道我要什么？

我要的就是你的关注啊。

可你却在最后一刻才满足我吗？

那一刻，这个浪荡丧气的中年大叔，委屈地像个孩子。

爱就算迟到，可终究也是爱啊。

所以，马男终于被治愈了？

没有，这部剧没这么善良。

下一秒，马男说到母亲住在ICU病房时，才突然醒悟：什么I SEE YOU，母亲只是读出了病房牌子上的ICU（同音）。

一切，都只是他的自作多情。

原来母亲直到最后一刻，都没有看过他一眼。

这才是人生啊。

人生没这么善良。

只是这一刻，马男脸上的苦涩，让人不忍心再看一眼。

那是他唯一一次在人前表达在乎，那是他唯一一次流露出脆弱。

我们总是期待着有大团圆。

可生活从来不是电视剧，不会在某个幸福的高潮点戛然而止。

我们能做的，或许就像马男一样，假装微笑并信以为真，放浪形骸来掩饰孤独。

并且死不承认脆弱。

有何胜利可言？

挺住意味着一切。

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（学英语用）音频Yes, yes, I see you. Get in. Get in.Your mother is having another one of her episodes. Last night, she went to seeA Doll’s Housewith a couple girlfriends, and now she has ideas. I emerged from my sanctum this afternoon to discover that not only had she not made me lunch, which is a meal I need in order to live, but she’d, furthermore, locked herself in the bedroom to weep. Loudly.Now it’s one thing for a woman to weep, but when they do it at such a volume you can hear it through the door, that’s when you know that they’re doing it just for the attention.Anyway, I was able to cobble together a sandwich for myself, so I’m the real hero of the story.[horn honking][tires screeching]It was a couple hours later when I realized I was on a good run with my novel. I had this really interesting sentence that kept going for pages and pages, and I thought about how rare it is to really get in the groove like that; how most days, I can’t concentrate because my idiot child is blasting the television and it suddenly dawned on me—hot cock on a rock, she never even picked up the little noise and snot factory![tires screech, horn honking]So, here I am, being your mother, which I know is giving you all sorts of mixed-up ideas about gender, while your brain is still loose and stupid. Just remember, if you become a queer later in life, this isn’t my fault! Don’t you sing no songs in your nightclub act called, “My Daddy was My Mommy,” while gazing longingly at a tangled string of pearls. Pearls are for ladies, BoJack. Pearls are for ladies.You know Sunday is my writing day. Sundays are the one day that are just for me and my craft, and still, you and the black hole that birthed you conspire to ruin it for me. What am I supposed to do now? Just go back to writing? I’m out of the zone now, the whole day’s shot! All because of you and that brittle wisp of a woman you made the mistake of making your mother.[sighs]No. It’s not her fault. She’s doing the best she can, after all. It’s just that… you can’t depend on women. You can’t depend on anyone. Sooner or later, you need to learn that no one else is gonna take care of you. That’s what I learned when I had to make my own sandwich. You can’t rely on other people, BoJack. It’s good for you to know that. And she’s a good mother for teaching you that. You’ve got a head start on most kids. You’re actually very lucky.[music continues over radio]Thaaaaank youuuuu?———So I stopped at a Jack in the Box on the way here, and the girl behind the counter said, “Hiya! Are you having an awesome day?” Not, “How are you doing today?” No. “Are you having anawesomeday?” Which is pretty… shitty, because it puts the onus on me to disagree with her, like if I’m not having an“awesome day,”suddenly I’m the negative one.Usually when people ask how I’m doing, the real answer is I’m doing shitty, but I can’t say I’m doing shitty because I don’t even have a good reason to be doing shitty. So if I say, “I’m doing shitty,” then they say, “Why? What’s wrong?” And I have to be like, “I don’t know, all of it?” So instead, when people ask how I’m doing, I usually say, “I am doingsogreat.”But when this girl at the Jack in the Box asked me if I was having an awesome day, I thought, “Well, today I’m actually allowed to feel shitty.” Today I have a good reason, so I said to her, “Well, my mom died,” and she immediately burst into tears. So nowIhave to comforther, which is annoying, and meanwhile, there’s a line of people forming behind me who are all giving me these real judgy looks because I made the Jack in the Box girl cry. And she’s bawling, and she’s saying, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” and I’m like, “It’sfine. It’s fine.” I mean, it’s notfinebut, you know, it’s… fine. And I would like to order a Double Jack Meal, and I’ve kinda got somewhere to be, so maybe less with the crying and more with the frying, huh? [inhales] And the girl apologizes again and she offers me a free churro with my meal. And as I’m leaving, I think, “I just got a free churro because my mom died.” No one ever tells you that when your mom dies, you get a free churro.[people murmuring][clears throat]Anyway, I’m sorry, that’s not part of the… [clears throat] All right. Okay, here we go. Let’s do this. Here I am, BoJack Horseman, doing a eulogy, let’s go. Hey, piano man, can I get a, like an organ flourish? [organ plays] Nicely done. You know, I was a little worried I wouldn’t have the right accompaniment today. I guess it’s a good thing my mom was anorgandonor! [rimshot plays] What happened to the organ? [horn ‘oogahs’] Okay, why just leave the comedy to the professionals? Okay? This is a funeral, sir, for my mother. Can you show a little respect? [trumpet whines] I’ll take it.Beatrice Horseman, who was she? What was her deal? Well, she was a horse. Uh, she was born in 1938. She died in 2018. One time, she went to a parade, and one time, she smoked anentire cigarettein one long inhale. I watched her do it. Truly a remarkable woman.[rustling]Lived a full life, that lady. Just, all the way to the end, which is, uh, now I guess. Really makes you think, though, huh? Life, right? Goes by, stuff happens. Then you die. Okay, well that’s my time, you’ve been great! Tip your waitress! No, I’m just kidding around, there’s no waitress. But seriously, that’s all I have to say about my mother. No point beating a dead horse, right? So…[inhales] Now what? I don’t know. Mom, you got any ideas? Anything? Mom? No? Nothing to contribute? Knock once if you’re proud of me.Can I just say how amazing it is to be in a room with my mother, and I can just talk and talk without her telling me to shut up and make her a drink? Hey, Mom, knock once if you think I should shut up. No? You sure? I mean, I don’t want to embarrass you by making thiseulogy into a me-logy, so, seriously, if you wanted me to sit down and let someone else talk, just knock. I will not be offended. No? Your funeral.Sorry about the closed casket, by the way. She wanted an open casket, but uh, you know, she’s dead now, so who cares what she wanted? No, that sounds bad. I’m sorry. I-I think that if she could’ve seen what she looked like dead, she’d agree it’s better this way. She looked like this.[groaning][mourners gasping]Kinda like a pissed-off toy dinosaur. The coroner couldn’t get her eyes closed, so now her face is forever frozen in a mask of tremendous horror and anguish. Or as my mom called it, Tuesday! Tuesday! My mom called it Tuesday.[woman coughs]Hey, Mom, what did you think of that joke? You like that? You never did care for my comedy.[clears throat]Here’s a story. When I was a teenager, I performed a comedy routine for my high school talent show. There was this, uh, cool jacket that I wanted to wear because I thought it would make me look like Albert Brooks. For months, I saved up for this jacket. But when I finally had enough, I went to the store and it was gone. They had just sold it to someone else. So, I went home and I told my mother, and she said, “Let that be a lesson. That’s the good that comes from wanting things.” She was really good at dispensing life lessons that always seemed to circle back to everything being my fault.But then, on the day of the talent show, my mother had a surprise for me. She had bought me the jacket. Even though she didn’t know how to say it, I know this meant that she loved me.Now that’s a good story about my mother. It’s not true, but it’s a good story, right? I stole it from an episode ofMaudeI saw when I was a kid, where she talks about her father. I remember when I saw it, thinking, “That’s the kind of story I want to tell about my parents when they die.” But I don’t have any stories like that. All I know about being good, I learned from TV. And in TV, flawed characters are constantly showing people they care with these surprising grand gestures. And I think that part of me still believes that’s what love is. But in real life, the big gesture isn’t enough. You need to be consistent, you need to be dependably good. You can’t just screw everything up and then take a boat out into the ocean to save your best friend, or solve a mystery, and fly to Kansas. You need to do it every day, which isso… hard.When you’re a kid, you convince yourself that maybe the grand gesture could be enough, that even though your parents aren’t what you need them to be over and over andoveragain, at any moment, theymightsurprise you with something… wonderful. I kept waiting for that, the proof that even though my mother was a hard woman, deep down, she loved me and cared about me and wanted me to know that I made her life a little bit brighter. Even now, I find myself waiting.Hey, Mom, knock once if you love me and care about me and want me to know I made your life a little bit brighter.[owl chirping]My mother did not gogentleinto that good night. She went clawing and fighting and thrashing, hence the face.[groaning][mourners gasping]If you’d seen her, I swear to God the only thing you’d be thinking about right now is that I amnailingthis impression.[woman clears her throat][chairs squeak]I was in the hospital with her those last moments, and they were truly horrifying, full of nonsencial screams and cries, but there was this moment, this one instant of strange calm, where she looked in my direction and said, “I see you.” That’s the last thing she said to me. “I see you.” Not a statement of judgment or disappointment, just acceptance and the simple recognition of another person in a room. “Hello there. You are a person. And I see you.”Let me tell you, it’s a weird thing to feel at 54 years old, that for the first time in your life your mother sees you. It’s an odd realization that that’s the thing you’ve been missing, the only thing you wanted all along, to be seen. And it doesn’t feel like a relief, to finally be seen. It feelsmean, like, “Oh, it turns out that you knew what I wanted, and you waited until the very last moment to give it to me.” I was prepared for more cruelty. I was sure that she would get in one final zinger about how I let her down, and about how I was fat and stupid and too tall to be an effective Lindy-hopper. How I was needy and a burden and an embarrassment—all that I was ready for. I was not ready for“I see you.”Only my mother would be lousy enough to swipe me with a moment of connection on her way out.Butmaybe I’m giving her too much credit. Maybe it wasn’t about connection. Maybe it was a… maybe it was an “I see you,” like, uh, “I see you.” Like, “You might have the rest of the world fooled, but I know exactly who you are.”That’smore my mom’s speed.Or maybe she just literally meant “I see you. You are an object that has entered my field of vision.” She was pretty out of it at the end, so maybe it’s dumb to try to attribute it to anything.[woman sighs]Back in the 90s, I was in a very famous TV show calledHorsin’ Around.[man coughs]Please hold your applause. And I remember one time, a fan asked me, “Hey, um, you know that episode where the horse has to give Ethan a pep talk after Ethan finds out his crush only asked him to the dance because her friends were having a dorkiest date contest? In all the shots of the horse, you can see a paper coffee cup on the kitchen counter, but in the shots of Ethan, the coffee cup’s missing. Was that because the show was making a statement about the fluctuant subjectivity of memory and how even two people can experience the same moment in entirely different ways?” And I didn’t have the heart to be, like, “No, man, some crew guy just left their coffee cup in the shot.” So instead, I was, like… “Yeah.”And maybe this is like that coffee cup. Maybe we’re dumb to try to pin significance onto every little thing. Maybe when someone says, “I see you,” it just means, “I see you.” Then again, it’s possible she wasn’t even talking to me because, if I’m being honest, she wasn’t really looking at me. She was looking just past me. There was nobody else in the room, so I want to think she was talking to me, but, honestly, she was so far gone at that point, who knows what she was seeing? Who were you talking to, Mom? [sighs] Not saying, huh? Staying mum? No rimshot there? God, whatever I’m paying you, it’s too much.Maybe she saw my dad. My dad died about ten years ago of injuries he sustained during a duel. When your father dies, you ask yourself a lot of questions. Questions like, “Wait, did you say he died in aduel?” and “Who dies in aduel?” The whole thing was so stupid. Dad spent his entire life writing this book, but he couldn’t get any stores to carry it or any newspapers to review it. Finally, I guess this one newspaper thought he was pretty hilarious, because they ran a review and tore him to shreds. So my father, ever the proud Mary, decided he would not stand for this besmirchment of his honor. He claimed the critic didn’t understand what it meant to be a man, so he demanded satisfaction in the form of pistols at dawn. He wrote the paper this letter, saying anyone who didn’t like his book, he would challenge to a duel, anyone in the world. He’d even pay for airfare to San Francisco and a night in a hotel. Well, eventually this found its way to some kook in Montana, who was as batshit as he was and took him up on the offer. They met at Golden Gate Park and agreed: ten paces, then shoot. But in the middle of the ten paces, Dad turned to ask the guy if he’d actually read the book and what he thought, but, not looking where he was going, tripped over an exposed root and bashed his head on a rock.[murmur]I wish I’d known to go to Jack in the Box then. Maybe I could have gotten a free churro. It would’ve been nice to have something to show for being the son of Butterscotch Horseman. My darling mother gave the eulogy. My entire life I never heard her say a kind word toorabout my father, but at his funeral she said, “My husband is dead, and everything is worse now.”“My husband is dead, and everything is worse now.” I don’t know why she said that. Maybe she felt like that’s the kind of thing you’re supposed to say at a funeral. Maybe she hoped one day someone would say that about her. “My mother is dead, and everything is worse now.” Or maybe she knew that he had frittered away all her inheritance, and replaced it with crippling debt, which is a pretty shitty thing to leave your widow with. “Bad news, you lost a husband, but don’t worry, you also lost the house!” Maybe Mom knew she’d have to sell all her fancy jewelry and move into a home. Maybe that’s what she meant by “everything is worse now.” Is that what you meant, Mom?I gotta say, I’m really carrying this double act. At least with Penn and Teller, the quiet one does card tricks. Hey, piano man, when I say something funny to my mom, how about you give me one of those rimshots?[rimshot plays]Yeah, but not now. When I say something funny. Like, okay. What’s the difference between my mother and a disruptive expulsion of germs? One’s a coughin’ fit and the other fits a coffin! That’s an example of a funny thing.[rimshot plays]Thank you. Let’s try again. Hey, Mom. What’s the difference between my mother and a bunch of Easter eggs? One gets carried in a basket, the other gets buried in a casket![rimshot plays]Ready for one more? Last one. What’s the difference between a first-year lit major and my mother, Beatrice Horseman? One is decently read, and the other’s a huge bitch![woman gasps][murmurs]Yeah, might have gone a little too far with that one. That one might’ve been a little too “my mom’s a huge bitch” for the room. I’m sorry, Mother. You’re not a huge bitch. Youwerea huge bitch… and now you’re dead.[woman sighs]You know, the first time I ever performed in front of an audience, it actually was, uh, with my mom. She used to put on these shows with her supper club in the living room and she used to make… [inhales] She used to make me sing “The Lollipop Song.”[organ playing tune]Those parties, they were really something. There were skits and magic acts, and ethnically insensitive vaudeville routines, and thebigfinale was always a dance my mother did. She had this beautiful dress that she only brought out for these parties, and she did this incredible number. It was so beautiful and sad. Dad hated the parties. He’d lock himself in the study, and bang on the walls for us to keep it down, but he always came out to see Mom dance. He’d linger in the doorway, scotch in hand, and watch in awe, as this cynical, despicable woman he married… took flight. And as a child who was completely terrified of both my parents, I was always aware that this moment of grace, it meant something. We understood each other in a way. Me and my mom and my dad, as screwed up as we all were, we did understand each other. My mother, she knew what it’s like to feel your entire life like you’re drowning, with the exception of these moments, these very rare, brief instances, in which you suddenly remember… you can swim.[flashback][partygoers laughing][classical music playing]But then again, mostly not. Mostly you’re drowning. She understood that, too. And she recognized that I understood it. And Dad. All three of us were drowning, and we didn’t know how to save each other, but there was an understanding that we were all drowning together. And I would like to think that that’s what she meant when we were in the hospital and she said, “I see you.”You know, the weird thing about both your parents being dead is it means that you’re next. I mean, you know, obviously it’s not like there’s a waitlist for dying. Any one of us could get run over by a Snapchatting teen at any moment. And you would think that knowing that would make us more adventurous, and kind, and forgiving. But it makes us small, and stupid, and petty.I actually had a near-death experience recently. A stunt went bad and I fell off a building. I’m an actor, I do my own stunts. I’m on this new show Philbert. I’m Philbert. Star of the show. It hasn’t come out yet, but it’s already getting Emmy buzz. Oh, speaking of buzz… [inhales] I’m supposed to take two of these every morning, but my days are so screwed up ‘cause of the shooting schedule, I don’t even know what morning means anymore. There’s a joke in there somewhere, about a guy who’s been to so many funerals, he doesn’t even know what mourning means anymore. Let you guys figure that one out for yourselves. [gulps]Anyway, you know what I thought, when I was falling off the building and I went into panic mode? The last thing that my stupid brain could come up with before I died? “Won’t they be sorry.” Cool thought, brain.[rimshot plays]No, that wasn’t… would you just… dial it back, all right?I don’t even know what“they”I wanted to be sorry. My mom, even before she died, could barely remember who I was. And of course, my dad’s dead. The last conversation I ever had with him was about his novel. He was so certain this book was his legacy. Maybe he thought it would vindicate him for all the shitty things he ever did in his stupid worthless life. Maybe it did, I don’t know. I never read it, because why would I give him that?I used to be on this TV show calledHorsin’ Around. Seriously, though, hold your applause.[man coughs]Well held. It was written by my friend Herb Kazzaz, who’s also dead now, and it starred this little girl named Sarah Lynn. And it was about these orphans. And early on, the network had a note, “Maybe don’t mention they’re orphans so much, because audiences tend to find orphans sad and not relatable.” But I never thought that the orphans were sad. I-I always thought they were lucky, because they could imagine their parents to be anything they wanted. They had something to long for.Anyway, we did this one season finale, where Olivia’s birth mother comes to town. And she was a junkie, but she’s gotten herself cleaned up, and she wants to be in Olivia’s life again. And of course, she’s like a perfect grown-up version of Olivia, and they go to the mall together and get her ears pierced like she’s always wanted and—sorry, spoiler alert for the season six finale ofHorsin’ Around, if you’re still working your way through it. Anyway, the horse tries to warn her, “Be careful, moms have a way of letting you down.” But Olivia just thinks the horse is jealous, and when the mom says she’s moving to California, Olivia decides to go with her. And the network really juiced the cliffhanger: “Is Olivia gone for good?” But of course, because it’s a TV show, she was not gone for good. Of course, because it’s a TV show, Olivia’s mother had a relapse and had to go back to rehab, so Olivia had to hitchhike all the way home, getting rides from Mr. T, Alf, and the cast ofStomp. Of course, that’s what happened. Because, what are you gonna do, just not have Olivia on the show? You can’t have happy endings in sitcoms, not really, because, if everyone’s happy, the show would be over, and above all else, the show… has to keep going. There’s always more show. And you can callHorsin’ Arounddumb, or bad, or unrealistic, but there is nothing more realistic than that. You never get a happy ending, ‘cause there’s always more show.I guess until there isn’t.[chuckles]My mom would hate it if she knew that I spent so much time at her funeral talking about my old TV show. Or maybe she’d think it was funny that her idiot son couldn’t even do this right. Who knows? She left no instructions for what she wanted me to say. All I know is she wanted an open casket, and her idiot son couldn’t even do that right. I’m not gonna stand up here and pretend I ever understood how to please that woman, even though so much of my life has been wasted in vain attempts to figure it out. But I keep going back to that moment in the ICU when she looked at me, and… “I-C-U.”“I… see… you.” Jesus Christ, we were in the intensive care unit. She was just reading a sign. My mom died and all I got was this free churro.You know the shittiest thing about all of this? Is when that stranger behind the counter gave me that free churro, that small act of kindness showed more compassion than my mother gave me her entire goddamn life. Like, how hard is it to do something nice for a person? This woman at the Jack in the Box didn’t even know me. I’m your son! All I had was you! [inhales]I have this friend. And right around when I first met her, her dad died, and I actually went with her to the funeral. And months later, she told me that she didn’t understand why she was still upset, because she never even liked her father. It made sense to me, because I went through the same thing when my dad died. And I’m going through the same thing now. You know what it’s like? It’s like that showBecker, you know, with Ted Danson? I watched the entire run of that show, hoping that it would get better, and it never did. It had all the right pieces, but it just—it couldn’t put them together. And when it got canceled, I was really bummed out, not because I liked the show, but because I knew it could be so much better, and now it never would be. And that’s what losing a parent is like. It’s likeBecker.Suddenly, you realize you’ll never have the good relationship you wanted, and as long as they were alive, even though you’d never admit it, part of you, the stupidest goddamn part of you, was still holding on to that chance. And you didn’t even realize it until that chance went away.My mother is dead, and everything is worse now, because now I know I will never have a mother who looks at me from across a room and says, “BoJack Horseman, I see you.” But I guess it’s good to know. It’s good to know that there is nobody looking out for me, that there never was, and there never will be. No, it’s good to know that I am the only one that I can depend on. And I know that now and it’s good. It’s good that I know that. So… it’s good my mother is dead.[gulps, sighs]Well. No point beating a dead horse. Beatrice Horseman was born in 1938, and she died in 2018, and I have no idea… what she wanted. Unless she just wanted what we all want… to be seen.Is this Funeral Parlor B?

Do not go gentle into that good night .E02采用交叉叙述的方式讲述Diane寻找身份认同之旅。

是个小标题变幻不同的发饰，体现时空的不同，最终引导出生活并不会因为在哪里而改变，除非自己扛过去，接受生活。

我的观感是混乱的。

这种交叉叙述没有加强身份寻找的意义与深度，反而显得很无所谓，很混乱。

这份剪辑上的混乱倒是体现了Diane在身份认同上的迷茫。

在出了E08 Mr.Peanutbutter 万圣节party交叉叙事那一集，完全可以说E02是试水之作，表达形式与表达内容分离的太开。

Todd与性爱机器人间的关系并没有展现很深的父子羁绊。

性爱机器人是Todd的一次构想，是错误领会满足他人需求的构想。

和其他Todd项目是偶然的产物。

这个设定没问题，但是展开就很奇怪了。

Todd带机器人去公司，是出于Todd自身的人物缺陷——错误领会别人的需求。

接下来性爱机器人展开的故事更多是讽刺精英与资本运营制度。

Todd在采访中露了一面，像皇帝新衣里的小孩指出这一切都是谎言，性爱机器人只是字面意义上的性爱机器人。

（我好奇的是Todd把机器人拉出垃圾桶时并没有想到机器人的语言只是提前录好的字面意义上的录好的语言。

）然后在女权的兴起下，公司关门了。

这时导演还不忘讽刺一把资本运营，让一串大公司组合的名字的老总给性爱机器人一张名片。

在性爱机器人贯穿的几个剧集里完全没有聚焦Todd与性爱机器人父子关系的事件啊！

那么结尾让性爱机器人仓促地喊出“爸爸我爱你”，实在没什么感动的地方，相反矫情的很。

这种矫情的不舒服还来自Todd和Yolanda分手的“百年”约定。

我想说的是，剧集是生活的提炼，不是生活的再现。

一百年后再结婚的分手话跟现实渣男也太像了吧！！！

我们先不讨论Yolanda是什么物种，作为Todd的人类真的能活到一百岁吗？

这不就是渣男分手时说的那种等怎么怎么样，我会来找你。

等朝鲜半岛统一，我再来找你。

等美国实现共产主义，我再来找你。

等太阳打西边出来，我再来找你。

Fuck！

许一个扯淡的诺言，然后拜拜，这绝对是导演经历过的人生再现。

越是深情款款说着不着四六的话，越是虚伪。

哪怕说五年之后，在第十季重新出现这个角色都可以。

一百年？

恐怕这部剧马上撑不住了，所以许下个虚无缥缈的诺言。

最最最最最最最让我失望的角色—— Mr.Peanutbutter .几乎喊出：FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!的这种失望。

片头曲我最喜欢的一幕是马男掉进泳池往上看，一个是 Diane另一个就是Mr.Peanutbutter。

Diane是马男的镜面， Mr.Peanutbutter 完完全全是马男的反面。

Mr.Peanutbutter 是什么的存在？

永远的开心果，永远的孩子。

所以他才是一个忠狗的形象，一高兴就吐舌头竖耳朵，完全不掩饰自己的喜好，完全不在乎别人的眼光，小孩子的形象。

在一部丧句里，我是说，马男、Diane都是悲观现实的人物形象，需要Todd和 Mr.Peanutbutter 这样的人物补充一下，调解口味。

首先，我承认E08这集在叙事上拍的确实好，交待了人物关系缘起，加深了人物羁绊，循环往复的插叙突出了问题，拍出了前三季的丧味儿。

问题是，解决问题的是Mr.Peanutbutter，人物形象发生转变的也是 Mr.Peanutbutter 。

之前说了， Mr.Peanutbutter 是小孩子形象，这是他的优点，也是他的缺陷，所有的笑料都来自于他永远乐观的精神。

现在他乐观的精神转向马男悲观的模样，理想的小孩长大了，这是背叛！

背叛观众的情感！

剧集是生活的提炼，不是再现。

马男提炼出我们丧的一面， Mr.Peanutbutter 展现出我们向往的乐观精神，永远活力，永远玩闹。

看到 Mr.Peanutbutter 我们就想起小时候的那些时光，简单、快乐、富有趣味，没有那么多的勾心斗角，没有那么多的争名夺利，即便 Mr.Peanutbutter 严肃起来，也不用担心，他只是虚张声势，下一刻马上会吐出舌头笑哈哈。

现在剧集让 Mr.Peanutbutter 长大了。

卧槽，难道我们生活中经历的背叛还不少吗？

曾经趴在土里一起弹弹子球的伙伴，现在西服革履，一年也见不上一回；曾经在闷热的网吧里衣衫劲头还大呼小叫打CS的同学，不知何时变得低眉顺眼，一说话总是和声细语；曾经一起拉手去厕所的小姐妹，现在约出来喝奶茶都没空，要在家奶孩子；是不是该结婚了？

是不是该生孩子了？

二胎要了吗？

我们的现实生活已经被压的喘不过气来，但是永远快乐的 Mr.Peanutbutter 仿佛曾经的玩伴，带着天真又充满活力的笑容出现，热爱party，热爱与人为善，是我们曾经拥有又现在羡慕的无忧无虑的生活。

结果呢？

他开始长大了？

变得跟我们有什么区别？！

他开始像成年人一样思考了，艹！

这些思考留给我们成年人就好了啊，不用你 Mr.Peanutbutter 来思考啊！

保持你的单纯和乐观啊！

但是 Mr.Peanutbutter 并没有，他开始觉得party吵闹了，他出轨了，他撒谎了，他的人设转变了，他的人设崩了，这部剧崩了。

We are all just guys.. who do good stuff sometimes and bad stuff sometimes.And all we can do is try to do less bad stuff and more good stuff,but you"re never going be good.Because you're not bad.当一直站在道德制高点严格约束自己和别人的Diane在某一天做了一件令自己都恶心的事的时候，她终于意识到,没有绝对的好人，也没有完全的坏人。

她不能理解自己怎么能做出一件如此违背自己道德底线的事，她甚至把自己描述成"a garbage fire" "a rudderless buring large garbage barge"。

但是她还是带着这种内疚恶心和PB又做了一次。

终于她发现了自己也不过就是个普通的人，也会犯错，也会明知故犯，也会屡教不改。

又或许这些错误只有自己耿耿于怀，压根没人想了解想深究，甚至未曾有人注意。

所以在BJ要她写文章揭发自己的时候，她才会说出那一番“反戴安”式的言论。

看起来是在劝说BJ,其实也是在说给自己听吧。

Whatever you put in that story,no one is gonna "hold you accountable"."You need to take responsibility for yourself." 她对自己说。

其实BJ说的没错，他俩的境况都差不多。

都很糟，但又没有那么糟。

她不再站在高处去指责BJ,跟在BJ屁股后面去逐个列出他的种种混蛋行为。

她甚至可以接受BJ“仍然糟糕只是变得清醒了一点”因为这时她大概明白了，一直以来她和BJ都是差不多的。

也许，她就是BJ。

分割线在等待第六季的过程中把第五季又重温了一下，这次是打开弹幕看的，我才发现原来Diane是一个如此有争议的角色。

大家可以清楚的定义Bojack是混蛋，PB是看起来暖但其实是不顾及他人感受的不成熟傻狗，PC是独立强大的事业型女强人，而Todd是个脑洞奇葩的小天使。

但关于Diane 的评论总是褒贬不一的。

有人觉得她是个十足的女权婊，也有人觉得她是全剧最清醒的，有人觉得她只是假正义其实自己也是一个混蛋，也有人觉得她只是思想很前卫，不理解她很正常。

要知道，人是矛盾综合体，这世界上没有绝对的好人和坏人，每个人身上都存在着让人温暖闪光点和让人无法想象的丑恶之处。

这世界，并不是非黑即白的，哪怕是一头大熊猫，哪怕是一匹斑马😆不必非要给一个人打上“好人”和“坏人”这种超明确的标签，谁又能保证自己一生没干过任何恶心人的事呢。

💅🏻参与这场关于“如何定义Diane”的激烈辩论赛的各位，不如稍安勿躁，让我们静静等待第六季吧。

🤓

2018年，马男波杰克突然在社交网络上走红。

一时间占领了微博微信，及许多人的社交头像，原因是“丧”对话引起了人们内心深处的认同。

马男波杰克被誉为“毒鸡汤”，是因为这部剧没有幻想未来的美好，而是讲述现实的残酷。

马男波杰克是人们内心的缩影，他自私自利无所事事甚至嗑药吸毒，他也渴望亲情渴望爱情，内心深处也有柔软。

原生家庭剥夺了他的快乐和自信，他的内心深处渴望认同，他的一生都在期待母亲对她的夸奖和认同。

他的人生是狂欢后的一地狼藉，他从未在大型典礼、派对中获得的快乐。

相反，他感到迷失，感到迷茫。

他不会爱人，也不会被爱。

他错过了鹿，赶到新墨西哥时，鹿已结婚生女。

他妄图与鹿私奔，但鹿觉得自己的生活很幸福。

他怅然若，失犯了更大的错误，准备用鹿的女儿代替鹿。

被鹿捉奸在床，责令他离开鹿的生活，他只得开船回到LA。

他永远没有花生酱先生的乐观，他不懂花生酱先生的自信与快乐。

他永远没有陶德的行动力，他瞻前顾后，错失良机。

他用酒精和毒品麻醉自己。

他更像鸵鸟，将头埋在沙中，仿佛可以躲过灾难。

马男波杰克的外祖母被丈夫切除了前额叶，从此失去了情绪，也再也不能思考。

他的母亲因为他而不得不嫁给一个没有前途的人。

他的父亲没有文学前途，却自鸣得意。

他的童年给他的人生奠定了灰暗基调。

他的童年既是不幸的源头，也是他逃避现实的理由，他一次又一次地将童年伤口上的结痂揭下来，露出血肉淋漓的伤口。

他将自己关在童年的笼子里，一遍又一遍地用童年来麻痹自己。

无论失败还是成功他永远都是那个在父母吵架时在角落瑟瑟发抖的小男孩，永远都是那个被母亲嫌弃的小男孩。

马男波杰克，他将人生中最珍视的东西狠狠地砸在地上，让其它们支离破碎，再用劣质的胶水，生疏的技艺将其胡乱地黏在一起。

他爱过黛安，爱过鹿，爱过PC，但他害怕责任，害怕未知。

他错失良机，终将追悔莫及。

胡闹的小马这部剧是他工作的开始，也是结束。

他沉迷于此，大概是因为，他从未有过如此温馨和谐的家庭。

我们也遇到过，遇到过诸多人生中的不顺意，我们也会搞砸，也会逃避，也会面临抉择，也会走错道路。

马男波杰克是一种象征，象征着我们内心中的脆弱，象征着我们所经历的种种挫折。

每个人心中都有一个波杰克 ，他冲动、混蛋、胆小、自私，但是他善良、美好的一面也在熠熠闪光。

马男波杰克，这部剧吸引我们的也许就是：哪怕生活是一地鸡毛，我们也得艰难前行。

也许山重水复之后，没有柳暗花明，我们也得继续寻找，在这个冰冷的世界里寻找，寻找属于自己的慰籍。

我主要从西方心理咨询这个视角，对每集的关键要点作了如下分集提炼。

按每三集一组，分了四组。

其中，大爱第五、六集。

第六集爆炸的IMBD评分（史上最高？

）了解一下：https://m.imdb.com/title/tt8266826/?ref_=m_ttep_ep_ep6以下为四组提炼。

第一组ep1 【生活方向】♦ Todd五季以来对明确的【生活方向】的持续追求。

ep2 【孤独/无归属感、无意义感】♦ 戴安的咨询师首次出场。

♦ 离婚激发了戴安的【孤独/无归属感、无意义感】ep3 【真实的自我】【不期待】♦ Gina被现实【压抑】的梦想（霍妮谈“真我”） 。

我们内心的冲突8.8卡伦霍妮 / 2015 / 译林出版社♦ 零期待以自保（@叔本华 存在主义心理治疗的思想基础）。

人生的智慧9.3[德] 叔本华 / 2014 / 上海人民出版社♦ 提了下《the wire》（隐含了编剧认可该老剧的深度）。

火线 第五季 (2008)9.72008 / 美国 / 剧情 悬疑 惊悚 犯罪 / 乔·施佩尔 厄内斯特·R·迪克森 乔伊·凯肯 斯科特凯肯 丹尼尔·艾提奥斯 阿格涅丝卡·霍兰 塞斯·曼恩 多米尼克·韦斯特 安东尼·海明威 克拉克·约翰森 / 多米尼克·韦斯特 雷格·E·凯蒂第二组ep4 暂无暂无ep5 【亲子代关系】♦ 卡洛琳的母子关系 @圆桌派-母子关系这期，萨特谈身体痛苦甚于精神痛苦。

阅后感：看到卡洛琳的UCLA录取函时 想到了自己的大学录取回忆；结尾卡洛琳毅然离乡时 继续泪奔。

ep6 【亲子代关系】【亲代冲突】【死亡恐惧】【孤独】♦ 父母间的严重冲突状况、父母把马男作为无反抗能力的情绪垃圾桶，对马男的成年状况的根本性的显著影响。

原生家庭8.3（美）苏珊·福沃德博士 （美）克雷格·巴克 [美国] 苏珊·福沃德 / 2018 / 北京时代华文书局（令和首日 一日看完 力荐）

儿童精神分析8.3[英]梅兰妮•克莱茵 / 2016 / 世界图书出版公司

101个心理治疗难题8.6Jerome S. Blackman / 2016 / 中国轻工业出版社

精神分析诊断9.6]美] N. McWilliams / 2015 / 中国轻工业出版社

精神分析治愈之道9.6[美] 海因茨·科胡特 / 2016 / 重庆大学出版社

思想等待思想者8.5[澳] Joan Symington [澳] Neville Symington / 2015 / 中国轻工业出版社♦ 被亲代教育【不能依靠任何人】 。

♦ 为母亲致悼词：回忆母亲讲了大道理后归罪于儿子、一生不愿示亲密于儿子等状况，展现对父母两人的极度愤怒。

♦ 呈现了父母之死带来的【死亡恐惧】。

直视骄阳：征服死亡恐惧8.7欧文·亚隆 / 2015 / 中国轻工业出版社

死亡哲学7.8[美] 谢利·卡根 / 2016 / 北京联合出版公司♦ 结尾神升华：“ICU”谐音梗提示了每人都need “to be seen”，且暗示了马男母亲也没有从其亲代处得到“to be seen”的关爱。

♦ 剧末点睛：【to be seen： 对于被关注的期待】。

第三组ep7 【求助】【孤独】♦ 大量调侃咨询业 ♦ "it's just good to have someone to talk to"ep8 【焦虑】【亲密模式】【自我呈现】♦ 狗男的亲密关系模式 ♦ 凯瑟琳的年龄焦虑 ♦ Todd对承担责任的焦虑 ♦ 新炮友谈波杰克的自我呈现

日常生活中的自我呈现8.6（美）欧文·戈夫曼 / 2008 / 北京大学出版社ep9 【孤独】【亲密关系】♦ 通过全新领域的app（这个我反复设想过5年以上的手段），来【寻找同类】（以建立更高质量亲密关系）的todd第四组ep10 【人际冲突】♦ 欲海中，未化解旧仇的2个老段子手：

意愿的冲撞8.4[美] 罗杰·古尔德 / 2017 / 华东师范大学出版社ep11 职场【暴力】 ♦ #metoo运动 的发酵过程。

ep12 【自我保护与成长】【高压】♦ 【对自己好一点：像对待自己希望保护的人一样 宽容、体谅自己】@芒格与乔丹·皮特森的提醒

12 Rules for Life7.9Jordan B. Peterson / 2018 / Random House Canada♦ 高强度工作（以凯瑟琳PR工作为例）易导致亲子关系问题。

♦ 女演员为了事业/资本所付出的巨大的【心理/情绪代价】。

♦ 戒药物成瘾：突破过去的舒适区、对专业人士求助，求得成长。

♦ 狗男一会儿向前妻求复合，被拒绝后转头又向新女友求婚。

编剧想凸显其乐观个性？！

♦ 被朋友“朋友”背叛、在关系中重伤的戴安。

结尾，普锐斯中的戴安独自启程。

我们 又回到了各自的生活，还得继续过下去。

裸辞后， 18-09-16 听着伴我来沪的YUI《Tokyo》写下这个短记，for me。

181110的新发现（于喜马拉雅与微信均可搜到）：《马男波杰克》的存在主义哲学：个体挣扎、社会现实、文化观念 （by小声喧哗 林三土）190811 快看完《曾奇峰精神分析视频50讲》后的新发现：B站【假蚁出品】ScreenPrism | 光影棱镜 | 马男波杰克 v.s. 广告狂人 | 第一季 · 第一集191111 双十一发福利：马男s6影评【西方心理咨询视角 第二弹】Get a WHY to live for（每周更新）

五季了，波杰克的成长有目共睹，反而是他身边的人毫无成长。

戴安的愤世嫉俗，花生酱的做事不经过大脑，卡洛琳公主还没明白她想要什么，陶德一整季过去了，又回到了原点。

波杰克的成长其实在于“接受”和“表达”，跟第一季的他相比，这季的波杰克（就结果来说）更诚实，诚实地对待自己，诚实地对待他人。

而且更重要的是，他学会了如何爱人。

其实和波杰克相比，戴安的问题更突显出来——她很善良，她很擅长如何对他人好，却不知道怎么对自己好，也许是她没被教过，也许是她自愿沉溺于悲伤。

在ep9她和马男吵架那里可以看出，是她想知道波杰克过去做过的龌龊事，知道了以后却又嫌弃他（因为说他很辣鸡），与其说她神经质不如说是因为她一直想站在一个道德的制高点，所以拒绝承认波杰克变好的事实，也不愿接受他垃圾的本质。

波杰克一直把戴安当做交心的朋友因为他们很像，其实看到这季最后会觉得其实他们除了丧以外都不像。

马男是向前进的那个，戴安不是。

她太害怕做出改变了。

唯一的好消息大概是花生酱没有跟戴安复合，因为他们真的不合适。

顺便提一嘴波杰克的药。

有确切描写的话，应该是这季ep8（万圣节派对）开始，原因应该是戴安在剧里提出他在新墨西哥的往事，加上碧翠丝过世这件事他想找人倾诉却又不想（不敢）面对这个话题，当然可能还有点是因为他真的背痛。

这样一想，戴安其实才是拖马男后腿的那个。

也许下季波杰克会加油把戴安也拖出泥潭？

另外，不得不说，马男整部剧的想象力无可比拟的，尤其是如何把社会话题合理地塞进剧情这一点，怎么想都觉得不可能有更妙的做法。

因为这种安排就是非常的马男。

很多人说第六集是神作，我觉得不然，11集才是。

11集有点像上一季碧翠丝回忆的那集，将波杰克的精神世界和现实世界完美交织，让观众在能清楚分开哪些是波杰克在剧中的表现的同时，表达波杰克把现实和剧混合起来之后的感受。

再说一嘴，波杰克和吉娜的分手其实很大程度上跟他自己没啥关系，因为可以说他当时已经处于一种精神不太正常（多半因为毒品）的情况，他是不能为自己的行为负责的，所以即使他学会了爱人，编剧仍然把他俩拆散了，所以这不是波杰克的锅，是编剧的锅。

而《菲尔伯特》被停播更不是他的锅啦，只是他为了吉娜做出了牺牲却未得到回报（可能再次对他留下创伤），让人有点为他感到难过。

这季评分下降我很理解，因为本季更少关注波杰克自身的丧，转向社会的丧。

像我这种想在马男这部剧里找共鸣、提醒自己有多丧的人在未经历社会的情况下社会问题有点提不起我的兴趣。

再说了，波杰克已经不那么丧了。

但无论如何，我都还是马男的死忠粉。

毕竟，不管怎样，马男是好起来了，社会还会好起来吗？

我隐约知道Mr. Peautbutter的问题在哪了。

他总是按照自己喜欢的方式去对别人好，但是这种方式有时候在别人看来并不是正真的理解。

他非常喜欢很多人能够喜欢他的感觉，这和他的人设——狗的性格非常像。

所以他去竞选州长，不是因为他想要权利，只是因为他喜欢大家在台下欢呼为他投票的这种popular的感觉。

所以说最后他和Diane走到离婚的地步是很能够理解的。

他是很爱Diane但是他不够懂她，他不能够理解Diane的痛苦和Diane的思考，每次都是非常天然呆非常乐天的说it doesn't matter，但是对于喜欢阅读和思考的Diane来说这样的cover并不能够满足她。

久而久之Diane的心中就会觉得面前这个男人是很不错，但是做不了她灵魂的伴侣。

他们可以一起玩耍但是不可以一起讨论人生。

因为对于Mr. Peautbutter来说人生太容易了，他只需要每天傻乎乎开开心心的然后什么事情都自然而然的来到他身边，但这并不是Diane这一类天生没有那么多优势的人的生活。

所以跟着Mr. Peanutbutter的生活就是渐渐空虚。

每天都是只有Mr. Peanutbutter才能够真正享受的快乐。

所以最后走到了离婚，生活看起来充满温馨充满爱，但是不够填补思想上的空洞。

所以这部剧的角色选取真的很别有用心，现实生活中，人也不会和自己心爱的宠物狗结婚，尽管主人和宠物狗都非常爱着对方， 但是毕竟不能够忽略宠物狗不懂生活这样的事实。

在剧中，Diane的选择则更加困难，因为Mr. Peanutbutter还能够带给她非常好的物质生活，要告别fancy house，告别名人妻子的身份开始独立生活是非常困难的。

Diane的不幸，印证了那句非常鸡汤的话——命运中的所有的馈赠都暗中标明了筹码。

只有像女强人Princess Caroline那样靠自己的奋斗得来的fancy life才是牢不可破的幸福。

所以当Princess Caroline告别她的资本家子弟男友的时候，才可以只考虑情感和生活，在物质上不会那么窘迫。

她的人生被毁灭了，于是她毁灭了另一个人，从而毁灭了很多其他的人。

这部剧的荒诞之处数不胜数，比如跟三个小孩伪装成的“男人”交往的PC、莫名其妙担任各种要职的Todd、因一句录音而当上公司老板的机器人等，无比荒诞中传递着无比合理的信息。

但最荒诞之处莫过于，主角是最大的反派：毫无责任心、不知廉耻、招摇撞骗、玩弄他人、黄赌毒样样精通……BoJack的罪孽可以说是罄竹难书，而这背后的始作俑者就是他的母亲，也是一个受害者。

Beatrice的童年在她哥哥死前可以称得上完美：事业有成的爸爸、当兵的哥哥，最重要的是她有一个柔情似水、贤良淑德、生了两个孩子依然保持少女身材的妈妈——像极了了不起的麦瑟尔夫人中的麦瑟尔夫人和致命女人中的Beth Ann。

这种笼罩在镜花水月中的完美有一个致命弱点就是，一切必须原封不动地按照既定轨道运行，只要有一丝偏差，就万劫不复。

更何况，发生在Beatrice和Beth Ann家庭中的偏差是那么地巨大——失去了孩子。

于是，一切假象在一瞬间破灭，温文尔雅的妈妈不再能handle everything，文质彬彬的爸爸也露出了真实的嘴脸，最终导致整个家庭分崩离析。

在CrackerJack死前，Beatrice的生活真有呈现出来的那么美好吗？

一个细节就可以证明，表面的万千宠爱后隐藏的仍然是根深蒂固的“嫌弃”：妈妈告诉她，雪糕是给男孩子们吃的，女孩子只能舔一舔冰块。

如果没有哥哥的死，Beatrice也许会继续生活在这种假象中，受着妈妈的潜移默化，变成和妈妈一样的女人，进入一个一样的家庭，过一样的人生。

她有两次可以改变命运的机会，一次是上大学，一次是结婚。

Beatrice的爸爸让她上大学的理由与我身边许多女性朋友的家长想法是一样的：我们花钱让你上大学是为了让你在婚姻市场上更有筹码，不是真的想让你成为什么女学者。

如果没有家庭变故，那么Beatrice大概率会成为麦瑟尔夫人。

可惜，她失去了妈妈这个榜样，童年受过霸凌，又在大学里接受了半吊子的新思想，于是变成了一个不伦不类的人。

择偶是她的第二次机会：本来有机会嫁给有思想有头脑甚至有颜值的富二代，却因意外怀孕而委身浪子，从此在“被嫌弃”的路上彻底无法翻身。

在又一个被什么都不知道的BoJack吵醒的半夜，她狠狠地对儿子、也对自己说：You'd better worth it。

因果循环，另一个生命又走上了被毁灭的道路，而被毁灭的自己的儿子，又在成年以后反过来继续嫌弃着她也被她嫌弃。

死前，她对自己的儿子说：I see you。

这句话到底是什么意思，我至今想不明白，也许BoJack也始终没有完全明白，他只知道，自己再也没有机会拥有一段正常的亲子关系了，只剩下getting worse这一种可能性了。

五季看下来，酣畅淋漓，没有任何违和或者烂尾的感觉。

只是第五季以BoJack去戒毒为结尾，让我不禁疑惑最终季会以怎样的形式收场。

显然，吸毒是果不是因，BoJack的人生不可能在戒毒之后就得到救赎。

But I still love BoJack, because when you think your life is a hole, look at BoJack and you will realize how lucky you are.

依着我对这剧的喜欢，其实是没法客观的去说的。

他们已经远不是角色了，他们是活生生的人，《登堂入室》里吉尔曼老师说：“文学会教给我们生命的一切。

”而吉尔曼老师的妻子对他说：“你知道这都是瞎扯淡，文学什么也不能教给我们。

”文学当然不能教给我们生命的一切，电影也不能。

电影终究是电影，故事也只是故事，阿尔弗雷多对多多说：“生活比电影苦多了。

”艺术能带给我们的只有对生命认知的启迪，对自我，对他人，对世界的思考。

我们终于可以用另一种眼光去感受世界，去探索自我。

很高兴在这几年里认识了他们。

戴安就是我最喜欢的那类女孩，敢于追求自我，无论是否被人们看作异类，愤世嫉俗，永不妥协。

花生酱先生是我羡慕着又讨厌着的人，他注定人人都爱，收获着快乐又单纯的一生。

波杰克是最复杂，最让我有同感，也最不愿意去接触的人，不幸的家庭让波杰克终将孤独，没有人会真的爱他，没有人在了解他后会真的喜欢他，说到底他是一个混蛋但也好像不止于此。

卡洛琳公主是最值得被爱的女强人，不依靠任何人，自己守护着自己。

他们是我的朋友，他们早已经融入我的生活，早已经是我的一部分。

因为戴安，我不去在乎很多事又去坚守着另一些事。

因为波杰克，我去认真思考我的人生。

这些人没有教给我生活的一切，但是他们就在那里，告诉你一切都不算太糟一切也都太糟了，他们相爱，好像生活就注定像焦糖玛奇朵，他们憎恨，就像生活只是一杯苦涩的让人头晕的啤酒。

不过…戴安还有波杰克，凯洛琳公主也领养了小baby，波杰克走入戒毒所……And as you know life is…just life…